Belated Christmas
by Miss Peg
Summary: A package arrives at the CBI leaving Lisbon frustrated and Jane rather curious as to the contents. Just a random bit of fun.


**Title:** Belated Christmas  
**Author:** Miss Peg/RedFi  
**Rating:** K+  
**Characters:** Patrick Jane & Teresa Lisbon  
**Summary:** A package arrives at the CBI leaving Lisbon frustrated and Jane rather curious as to the contents.  
**Disclaimer:** I don't own anything.  
**Spoilers:** None

**Notes**: This isn't a Christmas story; it's a January story with mentions of Christmas. It was written for Lothiriel who is Member of the Month on the Paint It Red Mentalist forum. I discussed the idea with her prior to writing it, so thanks for planting the seed that made this story grow.

'Jane!' Lisbon shouted across the bullpen.

He opened one eye from his couch, trying to decide whether her calls were urgent enough for his immediate attention. Deciding against it, he closed his eye and continued to doze. The moment of peace didn't last long, however, as he felt her presence hovering over him.

'Did you hear me?' she asked.

Sometimes he couldn't ignore her, regardless of whether he wanted to or not. Sitting up, Jane shrugged his shoulders and stared at her. She would get to the point sooner or later; he would sit back and relax on his couch in the meantime.

'Why are you getting packages delivered to the office?'

He frowned, trying to recall recent purchases before he answered. The last thing he'd bought online was a Christmas gift for the woman standing in front of him, but that came weeks ago and it was already sitting pride of place on her desk.

'I have a package?' he asked.

'You have a massive package, Jane,' she sighed. 'It took two security guards and the delivery man to get it into the building. What on earth have you been buying?'

Then it hit him, like a ton of bricks. Though, he hoped it wasn't a ton of bricks.

'I have no idea what's in the package,' he said, standing up and leading her back towards the hallway. Sitting by Lisbon's office door was a large box.

'How do you have no idea what's in the package when it's addressed to you?' asked Lisbon, raising an eyebrow.

He shrugged his shoulders and analysed the outside of the container. The box was made of wood; each slat had been nailed into place. The packaging intrigued him further. Now, how was he going to get inside? The box only made the whole experience that much more interesting.

'You've obviously never bought yourself a Christmas present, have you, Lisbon?'

She stared at him, her eyes wide and her brow furrowed. She looked as confused as she expected her to be.

'Don't look at me like that,' he said. 'You heard what I said.'

'I might have heard it, but I didn't understand it. How does someone buy themselves a present and not know what it is?'

He ran a finger along the top of the box, rattling his brain for ideas on how the open it. Without so much as a warning he stood up straight and shook his head.

'No imagination,' he muttered, returning to the source of his current frustration. 'I need a hammer or a crowbar.'

Lisbon scoffed and watched him in silence. He stared at her, hoping she'd help him with his predicament. When all she did was stare back, Jane walked off down the hallway.

'You can't leave this here,' Lisbon shouted after him.

'I'll be back in half an hour,' he said, ignoring her argumentation.

The box wasn't going to be easy to open and if Lisbon wasn't going to help him then he would find his own tools. He stood by the elevator awaiting its arrival when another idea hit him. He marched back down the corridor to find Lisbon still stood in the same position she'd been in a few moments earlier. The strained look on her face bothered him little as he walked straight past her and into her office. That ought to get her attention.

'What do you think you're doing?' she asked, following him into the small room.

'I need to borrow something.'

'This is a state law enforcement agency, Jane. You can't just walk into your superior's office and search their drawers.'

He smirked as he opened her top desk draw and produced her hammer, how he'd misplaced that gem of information, he didn't know. Probably too busy trying to figure out how to get into the damn box in the first place. Lisbon looked on in awe as he carried the hammer back into the hallway and started to use the end of it to crack open the box.

'I should have let them lock you up when I had the chance,' said Lisbon. Jane glared at her, all of her negative energy and small talk was taking over his need to focus on the task at hand.

The wood groaned as it shifted out of position, the first plank was the hardest as there was little room to move. After it had gone the others were more than easy to remove to the point that he pulled the last one away with his hands. He cursed loudly as a small scrap of the wood pierced his skin. No amount of injury would stop him from getting into the box; he focused on the gift and ignored the throbbing pain in the tip of his finger.

'Well?' said Lisbon, awaiting information on what he'd purchased.

The large box was filled with bubble wrap and a large item, Jane wrapped his hands around the sides of the object and attempted to lift it from its casing. His fingers slipped off the wrapping. Whatever he had purchased was too heavy for him to manage. He stood upright once more and searched the office.

''Rigsby,' he announced, walking across the bullpen towards his colleague. Rigsby, who had been watching from his desk, stood up and followed him without question across to the box. 'Help me lift it?'

Before he'd managed to coordinate a two person lift, Rigsby had already picked up the item and placed it carefully onto the ground beside the box.

'Show off,' said Jane.

'I think he means thank you,' said Lisbon. Rigsby smiled and watched from the side-lines as Jane unwrapped the gift.

'Exciting,' Jane said, beaming as he carefully pulled away the packaging. 'Don't you just love Christmas?'

'I loved Christmas when I was four years old,' said Lisbon, rolling her eyes. 'I also moderately enjoyed Christmas two weeks ago.'

'So it's a little late,' said Jane. 'Nothing wrong with extending the holiday season.'

Once the packaging had been removed, Jane stared at the large glass vase sitting in front of him. Not something he'd have chosen himself, but nonetheless, it wasn't a bad choice. He could have been happier, had it been something a little more on target, but he knew the risk he was taking. Presents were always a tricky one, especially when picked out by some young girl working at a department store. He circled the vase, following the carefully constructed pattern across the middle until his eyes landed on a red smudge.

'You bought a vase?' said Lisbon, obviously confused by his purchase.

'Mm-hm,' he mumbled, kneeling down and sniffing the edge of the porcelain. Within seconds he'd stood up and walked back to the box.

'What now?'

'Blood,' he said. He pushed aside a couple of pieces of packaging and nearly stumbled as he stepped backwards. 'Body. Dead body.'

Lisbon raised her eyebrows sceptically at him, until Rigsby had searched the box. 'I think the more accurate statement would be a pair of arms.'

'A pair of arms?' said Lisbon, looking into the box where she saw none other than a pair of arms that had been forcibly removed from their body.

'Remind me to not shop at Sitars again,' said Jane, covering his mouth as he took another look at the arms.

Lisbon shook her head and pulled out her cell phone. 'We need some help; we've got parts of a body. Third floor.'

'So, guess this is our next case?' said Jane with a small chuckle.

Lisbon rolled her eyes and stared at him. 'Thanks for doubling our workload. Next time, don't order stuff to the office.'

'Spoil sport,' he muttered, retrieving his cup of tea from beside his couch.

'Where do you think you're going?' asked Lisbon, following him across the bullpen.

'Upstairs, I have some thinking to do.'

'What about the case?'

'I've done my part, what more do you want from me?' he asked, carrying his mug out of the bullpen and down the hallway.

'Some help cleaning up the mess you caused would be good,' said Lisbon, more to appease herself than get her consultants attention back. She let out a sigh and returned to the box, it was going to be a long day.


End file.
